The Iron Scriptures

And Brodin spake unto his children, saying, "Thou shalt cast away thy garments of sloth and don thy armor of discipline, for the journey from the land of Dad-Bod into the promised gains requires forty days and forty nights of steadfast training." The Swolfather watcheth with approval as his followers traverse the desert of temptation, turning away from the golden calf of processed foods and embracing the sacred offerings of protein and vegetables; verily, through this Flexodus shall thy belly shrink and thy six-pack emerge as tablets of stone upon thy midsection.